It’s funny when we start to scroll through social media, start comparing followers and likes with other we follow, we internally start to make decisions about what we’re going to do next... especially if we’re desperate.
I follow a few of my students from Baltimore on social media sites. I have watched some of them transform right before my eyes, doing things that go against everything I know they have been taught at home, and especially by me when I was their teacher. Twerking on camera, lifting up their shirts, wearing a bra and dancing seductively for IG. I know they weren’t taught that... they’ve seen that all over social media from other women who do the same thing for likes and followers.
Many times, when we’re not getting the attention that we want, we begin to ask ourselves the following questions :
1. What am I not doing?
2. What are others doing that I’m not doing?
3. What can I do to gain more followers and likes?
4. How far am I willing to go?
Question 4 is the one that causes us to create an alternative version of ourselves to gain the attention we want. We could have a set of internal morals and values that we are willing to put on hold and push aside just so we can get what we want, when we want it. We’ve done the same thing in real life too.
We’ve compromised our character to fit in. We’ve put aside our beliefs just to fit in... when we were never born to do so! We create a false identity and begin to live as someone else completely. It gets to the point that we try to figure out who we are and what we’ve done with the REAL us.
I can remember compromising who I was for years just to gain friends in school and in my city. I stuck with it for so long because that’s how I was getting the attention and recognition I wanted. But when what I was doing was put on hold, I had to backtrack to pick up who I was because I had lost her somewhere among the friends, recognition, and acceptance that I was receiving. I had to pray and seek God on my purpose and who He had created me to be because I didn’t know anymore.
Comparing yourself to others can cause you to look at yourself through different lenses. You’ll start of changing small things, not because you want to, but because you feel you NEED to do it to be accepted by others. You’re putting your life into the hands of those who don’t know you, but for some strange reason are the ones you’re looking to accept you! The problem is that we don’t realize that at some point, the audience will move on after you’ve done your tricks and impressed them for a while. Now you have to go back and pick up the pieces of your REAL life that have been scattered... and none of your audience members will be there to help you.
Stay true to who YOU were born to be. The one thing that you have going for you that NO ONE else in the world has... is the dimple fact that YOU are YOU. You’re unique. There isn’t another person in the world who is YOU. If you spend your life trying to be someone else, than you end up being a watered down version of someone else. But if you strive to be your best YOU, then you’ll never have to compare or compete. You’re in a category all by yourself.